Bloodsong



Light is Defined by Darkness



We have been through this over and over again. We circle this path; resolve itÖ only to return again to where we started. It wonít end. I open my arms to you and you run from them. So again, I come to you.

We canít do this...

And you havenít given me a good enough reason why.

Weíre family!

I am you. Where I emerged onto this world is irrevelent, youíre speaking of a technicality. Our souls make us something more than family, the name Ďbrotherí has no bearing on what we are. It is merely a title given to classify what cannot be classified.

Youíre a man...

I donít have to be. My form is chosen as I wish. I can alter it, just as you can. I can look like anything you want. Male, female, neitherÖ it matters not to me. Right now Iím a crossing of both in a way. I like this form, this bodyÖ it suits me. Yet you fault me for a technicality and punish me for something youíve never experienced. What part of what you see isnít what youíre looking for? Soft skin? Smooth curves? Itís all there. I am more than what you think I am, but you shut your eyes to that truth.

Youíre not my type.

Are you sure? What type do you expect me not to be? AhÖ is it because of my generosity? My friendly nature? The presence of light that seems to be within me? My darling brother, if you think this of me then you donít know me at all after all this time. There is no light without darkness, for how would light be seen without the shadows to define and embrace it. I know the dark side better than even you who has been tainted to it for I was not swallowed within it. I was engulfed by it, hurt by it, and punished because it could not change me. You saw darkness from the inside out and thus your eyes became accustomed to seeing night. I could see both and so itís secrets were not hidden from me. I know evil, I know pain and decay. I know malice and the deepest hatred this world could see. That is the darkness that defines my light. If you are looking only at the faÁade that I give to this world in the way of hope, then you arenít looking at me. You are letting yourself be dazzled as they are. You should know better. I am you. I am more than that.

I am not in love with you.

Then you hate yourself. If you state this, itís the biggest lie you could ever tell yourself and the saddest. I am your lost piece, the hole that you canít define and forever attempt to fill with false dreams and promises. You can love and be loved and it will sedate you for a time, but nothing will love you more than I. Nothing will know you more than I. I am what has been stolen from youÖ you knew me long ago. You can feel it deep inside, a connection you canít define yet you run from it. I am yours... I always was.

I am my own person!

Yes, you are. But you are also like a man who lost his arm and finds it attached to another being. It doesnít stop you from being who you are. But it doesnít stop the arm from belonging to you either.

We canít...

We can. You just deny that truth.

Youíre my brother. My family...

I am you. I am yours.

I donít want to own you!

But you already do. Youíve owned me since I came into being, whether you want to or not is irrevelent. It is fact. You canít disown your own soul.

..........

Youíve given me plenty of excuses, my love. But none are good enough to banish what I am to you. Will you continue to cast me away? That hole will never close if you do.

My problems cannot be solved by tumbling you!

How can you claim that when youíve never done it?

How can you suggest it will, when Iíve never done it?

Ah... then we are in a quandary arenít we? And there is only one way to find out which of us would be right.

All this just to get me to bed you?

Is that all you think it would be? Are you sure?

What else would it be?

There is only one way to answer that, my twin. Only one way I could.

..........

Think about it for now. Iíll be here. Iím always hereÖ you can always find me, always call for me. I will come to you when you are prepared to know the answer...




Page created by: avarien@core.com
Changes last made on: June 6, 2003